Adoption.
 

Alright guys, my wife and I have talked about adoption, and we don't really know what we're doing.
We know we need legal representation to avoid the biological parents from coming back and trying to reclaim the child. But we don't really know where to start.
Any advice?

Re: Adoption.
 

Good place to start:
[url=http://adopting.adoption.com/]Adopting a Baby, Child, Infant. Foreign, Foster Care, Single, Step Parent Adoptions[/url]

Re: Adoption.
 

talk to someone who knows what the hell their doing

Re: Adoption.
 

I've always respected Dave for his charity (RIP). Maybe you can find some good stuff here:
[url=http://www.davethomasfoundationforadoption.org/]Dave Thomas Foundation for Adoption[/url]

Re: Adoption.
 

I don't have specific advice, but yeah--get legal help, and use the web, at least to get a feel for the things you're going to need.

Good luck!!! Adoption is a good thing, both for parents and children.

Re: Adoption.
 

good luck and do it right so the kid and you guys dont have to face alot of bulls*** later on

Re: Adoption.
 

[QUOTE=dall-assblows;262035]talk to someone who knows what the hell their doing[/QUOTE]

Now there's some useful information. :rolleyes:

Re: Adoption.
 

If you decide to adopt overseas, PM me. My wife and I have done it and I work in the part of the USG responsible for overseas adoptions.

In any case, I think adoption is great. Good luck.

Re: Adoption.
 

If you are interested in Eastern Europe, start here:
[url=http://www.eeadopt.org/]EEAC - Home[/url]

If you are interested in Ukraine, I can forward you the name of someone knowledgeable to talk to.

Re: Adoption.
 

forgive the intrusion of privacy, but are you considering adoption because you can't have your own kids, or just want to support adoption in general and share your household with someone less fortunate...

The reason I ask, is because I would like to adopt a child. My wife and I have 2 young children who are perfectly healthy and we are really blessed. I understand that, but I still support adoption 100%. There are alot of children out there who need homes and a family, and I want to be able to share that with someone who needs it, but my wife is against that idea, and her family and even my own family agree with her that we should have our own kids since we are fortunate enough to be able to...

I don't quite get the logic, so I was just wondering what is prompting you to consider it....

Re: Adoption.
 

[QUOTE=canthetuna;262236]forgive the intrusion of privacy, but are you considering adoption because you can't have your own kids, or just want to support adoption in general and share your household with someone less fortunate...

The reason I ask, is because I would like to adopt a child. My wife and I have 2 young children who are perfectly healthy and we are really blessed. I understand that, but I still support adoption 100%. There are alot of children out there who need homes and a family, and I want to be able to share that with someone who needs it, but my wife is against that idea, and her family and even my own family agree with her that we should have our own kids since we are fortunate enough to be able to...

I don't quite get the logic, so I was just wondering what is prompting you to consider it....[/QUOTE]

I feel the same way you do. I hope one day that I can adopt a child. It just kills me to think about those kids without a family.

Re: Adoption.
 

[quote=canthetuna;262236]forgive the intrusion of privacy, but are you considering adoption because you can't have your own kids, or just want to support adoption in general and share your household with someone less fortunate...

The reason I ask, is because I would like to adopt a child. My wife and I have 2 young children who are perfectly healthy and we are really blessed. I understand that, but I still support adoption 100%. There are alot of children out there who need homes and a family, and I want to be able to share that with someone who needs it, but my wife is against that idea, and her family and even my own family agree with her that we should have our own kids since we are fortunate enough to be able to...

I don't quite get the logic, so I was just wondering what is prompting you to consider it....[/quote]
You know alot of people feel the way as your parents and hers do which is kind of natural. I had a friend who he and his wife had tried but finally gave up trying to have a child after much heart break and high cost. At first he kind of had this same feeling but if asked today he would not change a thing as he and his son are as tight as any father and son I've been around. Any one can have a child but not everyone can be a parrent and we get all hung up on this blood relation stuff.

Re: Adoption.
 

[QUOTE=LRT;262192]If you decide to adopt overseas, PM me. My wife and I have done it and I work in the part of the USG responsible for overseas adoptions.

In any case, I think adoption is great. Good luck.[/QUOTE]

We've actually considered adoption a little Italian boy, but never looked into it. My wife is a mutt in terms of gene pool, I am 75% italian, as evident by my last name.
Is it easier to adopt overseas?

Re: Adoption.
 

[QUOTE=canthetuna;262236]forgive the intrusion of privacy, but are you considering adoption because you can't have your own kids, or just want to support adoption in general and share your household with someone less fortunate...[/quote]

No intrusion at all.
The quickest way to say this is, we can't have kids.
The longer version can be found on this thread:
[url]http://www.thewarpath.net/redskins-warpath-parking-lot/16371-can-you-hear-me-now.html[/url]

[quote]The reason I ask, is because I would like to adopt a child. My wife and I have 2 young children who are perfectly healthy and we are really blessed. I understand that, but I still support adoption 100%. There are alot of children out there who need homes and a family, and I want to be able to share that with someone who needs it, but my wife is against that idea, and her family and even my own family agree with her that we should have our own kids since we are fortunate enough to be able to...

I don't quite get the logic, so I was just wondering what is prompting you to consider it....[/QUOTE]

I can understand both points of views...but I've always wanted to be able to help the less fortunate kids...I mean they could be adopted by some Cowpattie fan!!!! UUUCK!

Re: Adoption.
 

[QUOTE=onlydarksets;262197]If you are interested in Eastern Europe, start here:
[url=http://www.eeadopt.org/]EEAC - Home[/url]

If you are interested in Ukraine, I can forward you the name of someone knowledgeable to talk to.[/QUOTE]

Thanks for the link.

Re: Adoption.
 

I don't mean to make light of the situation, but if your planning on adopting from China, you might want to do it sooner rather than later.

[url=http://www.nytimes.com/2006/12/20/us/20adopt.html?em&ex=1166850000&en=015f107024876060&ei=5087%0A]China Tightens Adoption Rules for Foreigners - New York Times[/url]

Apparently the Chinese have something against fat, ugly, and single people.

I wonder what country this law is aimed at?

Re: Adoption.
 

[QUOTE=Citizens for 81;262549]I don't mean to make light of the situation, but if your planning on adopting from China, you might want to do it sooner rather than later.

[url=http://www.nytimes.com/2006/12/20/us/20adopt.html?em&ex=1166850000&en=015f107024876060&ei=5087%0A]China Tightens Adoption Rules for Foreigners - New York Times[/url]

Apparently the Chinese have something against fat, ugly, and single people.

I wonder what country this law is aimed at?[/QUOTE]

That's interesting!
I don't have any interest in adopting any child that looks drastically different than I do. I just don't want to go through the slew of problems that would bring. Like if the child gets picked on, then of course I have no background to make him feel better...I feel it might alienate the child. But if I got a European child, especially an Italian child, I'd be able to have no problems overcoming the child's adversity.

Re: Adoption.
 

[quote=jsarno;262535]We've actually considered adoption a little Italian boy, but never looked into it. My wife is a mutt in terms of gene pool, I am 75% italian, as evident by my last name.
Is it easier to adopt overseas?[/quote]

It's more certain, in that pretty much anyone can get a kid within a year. However, I believe it is more expensive (I'm not 100% certain on that), and, depending on the country, you could run a higher risk of adopting a child with mental or physical disabilities. However, there are steps you can take to minimize the likelihood of that (or increase the likelihood, since many people seek out children with difficulties).

Re: Adoption.
 

Adopting girls from Asian countries, particularily China and Korea, is both a very easy and very noble thing, since many of these kids will grow up in an orphanage and end up as either sweatshop workers or trafficked sex slaves. Good for you that you are looking into this.....

Re: Adoption.
 

[QUOTE=djnemo65;263092]Adopting girls from Asian countries, particularily China and Korea, is both a very easy and very noble thing, since many of these kids will grow up in an orphanage and end up as either sweatshop workers or trafficked sex slaves. Good for you that you are looking into this.....[/QUOTE]

I just don't know if I could handle the amount of issues that would pop up with an asian child. I don't want people to KNOW he or she is not my child.

Re: Adoption.
 

[QUOTE=jsarno;263175]I just don't know if I could handle the amount of issues that would pop up with an asian child. I don't want people to KNOW he or she is not my child.[/QUOTE]

What issues?

What's wrong with people knowing that the kid is not yours?

Re: Adoption.
 

[QUOTE=cpayne5;263180]What issues?

What's wrong with people knowing that the kid is not yours?[/QUOTE]

Nothing really, it's more of protection for the child.
Maybe I'm just being stupid, I just know it's hard enough on kids, and I don't want to make it any harder.

Re: Adoption.
 

[QUOTE=jsarno;263186]Nothing really, it's more of protection for the child.
Maybe I'm just being stupid, I just know it's hard enough on kids, and I don't want to make it any harder.[/QUOTE]

Given a choice a kid would prefer to have adopted parents of different race than being dragged through foster care. It's really our own preference and the commitment necessary that keeps us from looking outside our race. Yes the kids will have a rough time and get that stare when they call you dad but that's minor compared to spending Christmas with different foster parents every year if that.

I'm not saying be color blind, far from it. It's the adopting parents' responsibility's to teach the kid about their race and often times that's one of the factors that discourages couples from adopting children of different race. That's a big challenge and commitment, and your really can't blame people if they take the shorter path.

Call me crazy but I'd love to see kids adopted even by gay parents. Why the hell should a kid be in foster care when there are people willing to adopt them and love them?

In any case I wish you and your wife the best of luck and I would encourage you to at least explore the possibility of adopting a [URL="http://www.amren.com/mtnews/archives/2004/12/growing_number.php"]black or mixed-race child[/URL].

p.s. Five of my cousins who live in Italy are married or engaged to Italian men/women so I know the kind of pressures exerted and expectations levied by Italian families :)

Re: Adoption.
 

[quote=cpayne5;263180]What issues?

What's wrong with people knowing that the kid is not yours?[/quote]
if you get the kid early enough, it will be yours no matter what the color of his/ her skin

Re: Adoption.
 

[QUOTE=saden1;263190]Given a choice a kid would prefer to have adopted parents of different race than being dragged through foster care. It's really our own preference and the commitment necessary that keeps us from looking outside our race. Yes the kids will have a rough time and get that stare when they call you dad but that's minor compared to spending Christmas with different foster parents every year if that.

I'm not saying be color blind, far from it. It's the adopting parents' responsibility's to teach the kid about their race and often times that's one of the factors that discourages couples from adopting children of different race. That's a big challenge and commitment, and your really can't blame people if they take the shorter path.

Call me crazy but I'd love to see kids adopted even by gay parents. Why the hell should a kid be in foster care when there are people willing to adopt them and love them?

In any case I wish you and your wife the best of luck and I would encourage you to at least explore the possibility of adopting a [URL="http://www.amren.com/mtnews/archives/2004/12/growing_number.php"]black or mixed-race child[/URL].

p.s. Five of my cousins who live in Italy are married or engaged to Italian men/women so I know the kind of pressures exerted and expectations levied by Italian families :)[/QUOTE]

Good post, thanks for the link. You make a persuasive argument.

Re: Adoption.
 

[QUOTE=saden1;263190]Call me crazy but I'd love to see kids adopted even by gay parents. Why the hell should a kid be in foster care when there are people willing to adopt them and love them?[/QUOTE]

You are not crazy. I totally agree. It's incredible how some people can try to justify denying a child of a family.

I realize this post is kinda meaningless, and it might offend some people. Sorry. It just kills me to think of children without families.