[Lotus]

DRave, it sounds like your old partner has very deep feelings for you. Feelings that they can't control or conquer very easily. Therefore the need to cut you out of her life - she can't have a relationship with you nor can she throttle the feelings into friendship alone, leaving "cut and run" as the only strategy for her. From her point of view, it likely is preferable to have no feelings for you at all than to have uncontrollable feelings in the context of friendship. And the only way to have no feelings for you is to pretend that you do not exist.

If I am right, it will be difficult to be friends with her any time soon. Maybe not ever. But as hard as that might seem, it is actually a supreme compliment toward you.