Creepy guy (or gal) in the movie theater.

[gabe1984]

As 12thman pointed out yesterday on the f the creepy people at work thread, I have a unique ability to attract crazy people towards me. Here's another example.

I graduated from the University of Maryland in May of 2006. During my senior year my buddy and I went to go see the 40 Year Old Virgin at the Hoff, which is a huge auditorium on campus that they play movies at. This place is big, it's gotta seat around 1,000 people. Anyone who goes to Maryland will probably agree that it's the largest theater they've ever seen a movie in.

Anyways, my buddy and I got there kinda early, we were in the first 50-100 people in line. So, we go in and sit down right in the middle of the auditorium and wait for the movie to start. On either side of us, there's atleast 15 empty seats before there was someone else sitting. Infact, the theater is less than 1/4 full, and people are slowly trickling in. To put it simply, there was no lack of seats, you could pretty much still sit where ever you wanted to.

All of a sudden this Asian being speedwalks down my row and parks it in the seat directly to my left. Not only did this person sit right next to me, but the person was nudging up against me. Keep in mind that there are about 800 empty seats open. With all the empty seats in the theater, why this person decided to sit next to me, body rubbed up against mine like there was a fat a guy in the seat to his left pushing him into me, I have no idea. At this point, my buddy and I just completey loose it and cannot stop laughing, it was hilarious.

To make things even funnier, as you've noticed I've referred to this person as a being or person, because I honestly could not tell the gender of this person. It had short hair, however it didnt sit like a man would sit. It sat cross legged, but it was like the kind of cross legged that would crush your balls. Bottom of the right knee, all the way up to the quad of the left leg, it's right elbow on my left arm rest, pointer finger extended up the side of his cheek, while the rest of fingers held in place right below his nose. Go head, practice that pose so you can get a feel for what was right next to me, with his elbow on my left arm rest. I was laughing so hard that it hurt, and at the same time I felt really uncomfortable.

It gets even better because as the theater filled up, no one came in to sit with this being. The theater eventually filled up, but it was just there by itself, it did not talk to the people who sat on the other side of it. Also, it did not laugh one time during the entire movie. How can you not laugh at the 40 Year Old Virgin. We were tempted to ask it after the show why it sat next to me, but decided not to because we feared for our lives. Needless to say, this person was very creepy.