Adult Mad Libs (NC-17, sorry kids)

[Hail2theskins]

Bill "The [Blue Footed Booby]" Parcells decided to take a break from [anal extravaganza 17] for a day so he could take his grankids and some [disgruntled] youths to the local amusement park "[42] [buttplugs] Over Texas."

Bill was [perplexed] at how expensive each ticket was, but was was able to give his [browneye] to the park supervisor to give him a discount. All he had to do was [injest] some [baby batter] and [eat] some [butt] with some of the park staff.

Once inside the kids ran to the first [sane adult] that they saw. Unfortunately the man] was really [mr slave] and Bill had to [commence to jiggling] for over an hour. Finally they all got on the [whirloride], and that was something the Bill would regret for the rest of the day. First the [Kong Dong] that Bill was strapped onto started [girating] around in a circle, then it [flipped] upside down 65] of times in a row. Then, without warning it [Splooged] to a stop and Bill hurt his [Anus] on one of the straps.

Next, the kids dragged Bill over to the Bumper [Gorillas]. This was more his style becaue he could [eat] and relax, at least until the kids teamed up on him! For the next [37] minutes Bill was [raped] by all the children. This was far from relaxing.

After a few more [rapings] Bill and the kids decided to grab some [Taquitos]. They ate [Beans] and drank [vomit]. This ended up costing Bill most of his [pride]. After the [Splash park] the kids wanted to [kill] some [whitey’s]. For only $[37] the kids could try to [screw] a [penguin] into a [submission] for the chance to winng a [super soaker]. Half the kids won [pocket] [vaginas], so Bill's [stomach] was filled for the rest of the day.

"Okay, one more [ride] and then it's time to go. Grandpa '[Fat Tits]' is getting [Swollen]." After a ton of [bickering] the kids finally decided to go on the [Poop Monger]. This was the biggest [dildo] in Texas, and Bill was [loose enough to handle it]. The ride started out [slow] as the [Schlong] climbed up a [anal cavity]. Once at the top Bill could [eat] the entire park. On the way down Bill could only think "[FANTABULOUS]!" He had never gone this [feeling] in his life and it was making him sick. By the time it was over everyone was [pissed off] at poor Bill because he had [shit] all over himself.

That was the most [hellatious] trip to the [fondu festival] that Bill had ever taken. He knew there was no way he was ever [taking] the kids back to 42] [buttplugs Over Texas ever again.

[ArtMonkDrillz]

Here's a new one, and it might be more fan-friendly.

"Listening to 724 complain about the length of {adjective} {noun} is like listening to a {profession} complain about {gerund} {adjective} {plural nouns}."

[BDBohnzie]

"Listening to 724 complain about the length of {4th quarter} {pukefests} is like listening to a {ditch digger} complain about {illuminating} {funky smelling} {corpses}."