The Rant Thread

[MonkFan4Life]

I don't like it myself. Maybe I don't have enough hair on my chest but Guinness is just not for me. Had it one time when I took my best friend out for his birthday for one of those Get Fucked Up nights cause he turned 30. The night went to shit once the G came into play. We had got nice and baked then went to Remmingtons in College Park to get something to eat. So we order and I got this Grilled Chicken Sandwich with Bacon and Cheddar Cheese with some fries I think and a Heineken. Later I got a Remy on the rocks. He orders some Chicken Sandwich with Crab dip on it plus some Crab Dip for an appetizer. Thinds really went south when he looked at me and said "You gonna have a Guinness with me?"

Now me trying to be a good friend I say hey, the wife is sleep with the boy, I won't be getting that tonight so F it. So I get the G with him, we toast his 30 and take our sips. He taps out after about 3 sips saying that his stomach feels a little fucked. I drink half of mine. We leave because they had a DJ and it started to pack a little too much for us and besides we still had about 3 J's left for the night. We leave Remmington and decide to hit the Bowling Alley in Crofton. To get the taste of Guinness out of my mouth I ate a piece of this gum I had, some nasty shit. He asks me for some and I tell him it's horrible and he should leave it alone. On 50 we're tokin and he's chewing the gum, we get off of 50 at the 197 Bowie. While coming up on Bowie Town Center we're at that first light, there's a PG in the right lane so I'm in the left lane because I know if I get pulled over I'm not going to enjoy the night. He says that his head is spinning, i tell him to go to sleep. He sits up and rolls my window down. Pukes all of his food on the side of my van. I'm laughing my ass off, cars are honking and I pull into the parking lot of the Safeway and he's still puking.

I look at my van while he's hunched over yelling at the gravel. Funny ass night. We ended the night with going to CVS so he can pick up a toothbrush (I keep toothpaste in my car) and then go to Bowiling Alley so he can brush his teeth and wash the shame off his face.

So I said all of that to say this. Guinness isn't for me. Too heavy of a beer.