F... office dumpers

[gibbsisgod]

YEAH ,warm toilet seats make me feel kinda dirty

[gibbsisgod]

and F... these water saving toilets that cant even swallow a decent turd. we have one of these at work and it seems like you need to plunge after every shit

[mooby]

Originally Posted by memphisskin

I'm Memphisskin, and I'm an office pooper.

LOL. Makes me feel like this thread is Office Poopers Anonymous.

My current job has one restroom that everybody uses except for the GM/VP and other higher ups. It's got 4 stalls in it, and 3 of them don't even have locks, so if you're in one of those stalls you have to keep your guard up in case some guy barges in and pushes the door open. Because everybody from sales/service/parts/the garage uses this bathroom, there is a foul smell constantly lingering. I try to avoid it whenever possible.

[Monkeydad]

Save it for home????


HA! I'd like to see you hold in Montezuma's Revenge for 8 hours.




I don't see a problem with it when it's necessary...but making it your job at your job is wrong. You need to see a doctor if you do it more than once or twice a day.

[JoeRedskin]

This may be TMI (though at this point, can we ever really say that about anything again), but several years ago I had large portions of my insides removed. The net effect was to make me hit the can on a fairly regular basis. Unfortunately for my coworkers, the bathroom is pretty much unusuable after one of my sojourns.

I get symphonic (I am putting extra sound proofing in the bathroom I am installing in our basement - Yes, it's THAT loud), it stinks to high hell (even I gag - that's pretty bad), and sometimes it's splatter shit (consistency is an inside joke in my home - my wife will ask "So, were you squirting soup or dumping dough?"). But guess what folks? I am too f...ing old to care and, even if I did, I ain't got any other options. But, hey, I leave the fan on.

I actually have seen coworkers turn around when they see me exit. Once, one unsuspecting soul walked in and, as I walked off, I heard something along the lines of "OH MY GOD, KILL ME NOW!". I just laughed knowingly to myself.

Ah well, if it didn't stink like shit, we wouldn't do it in private.

[SmootSmack]

I have no idea what to say after reading JoeRedskin's post.

"Symphonic" classic...yet disturbing

[MTK]

Originally Posted by TAFKAS

I have no idea what to say after reading JoeRedskin's post.

"Symphonic" classic...yet disturbing

Ummm yeah, hard to top that post.

JoeRedskin just pwned us all

[FRPLG]

Originally Posted by JoeRedskin

This may be TMI (though at this point, can we ever really say that about anything again), but several years ago I had large portions of my insides removed. The net effect was to make me hit the can on a fairly regular basis. Unfortunately for my coworkers, the bathroom is pretty much unusuable after one of my sojourns.

I get symphonic (I am putting extra sound proofing in the bathroom I am installing in our basement - Yes, it's THAT loud), it stinks to high hell (even I gag - that's pretty bad), and sometimes it's splatter shit (consistency is an inside joke in my home - my wife will ask "So, were you squirting soup or dumping dough?"). But guess what folks? I am too f...ing old to care and, even if I did, I ain't got any other options. But, hey, I leave the fan on.

I actually have seen coworkers turn around when they see me exit. Once, one unsuspecting soul walked in and, as I walked off, I heard something along the lines of "OH MY GOD, KILL ME NOW!". I just laughed knowingly to myself.

Ah well, if it didn't stink like shit, we wouldn't do it in private.

Is this officially the END of the internet? I feel abused now.

[mooby]

In school, it's like a mortal sin to take a dump. If you do, and somebody walks in, your in trouble, because they will walk out, grab anyone walking around in the halls, and bring them to the scene to laugh at you when you come out the door.

That's why i never eat breakfast, and i always save it for when i'm home. One time i did eat breakfast, and i ended up using the restroom before school started, luckily nobody caught me because i went to a rarely used men's teachers bathroom at the back of the school that isn't locked.

As for the people at work that do that often, maybe they just sit on the john and pretend they're taking a dump, and look at their cell phones or something, just so they can get paid while not actually working.

[steveo395]

Originally Posted by mooby

In school, it's like a mortal sin to take a dump. If you do, and somebody walks in, your in trouble, because they will walk out, grab anyone walking around in the halls, and bring them to the scene to laugh at you when you come out the door.

That's why i never eat breakfast, and i always save it for when i'm home. One time i did eat breakfast, and i ended up using the restroom before school started, luckily nobody caught me because i went to a rarely used men's teachers bathroom at the back of the school that isn't locked.

As for the people at work that do that often, maybe they just sit on the john and pretend they're taking a dump, and look at their cell phones or something, just so they can get paid while not actually working.

dude ice been in school for like 1`2 years or we and ive never taken a dump mad nicccccccce

[BigSKINBauer]

yeah when someone is doing number 2 in school you take a paper towel, get it all nice and wet, get another few and do the same thing, and throw them over the door. Its not like they are going to get up and do anything.

[EternalEnigma21]

Originally Posted by BigSKINBauer

yeah when someone is doing number 2 in school you take a paper towel, get it all nice and wet, get another few and do the same thing, and throw them over the door. Its not like they are going to get up and do anything.

That doesn't change when you get out of school. I dump at the office all the time. Its the only time to get some real good Tetris time in.

But when you get older you'll realize that you can arm yourself inside the stall and listen for the door, and aim a piss soaked tp wad right at it... then who's laughing!

[NAVYSKINSFAN]

Office dumping is nothing. Try being crammed into a large berthing with 70 other dudes for six months on a ship. Understand that we are eating crappy food the whole time inclding Class D beef prepared by high school drop outs who were told by a judge "join the military or go to jail". We shared three showeres, six sinks, 2 pissers, and three toilets. With that many people there were almost always at least 2 people at a time dumping. The worst part of all is that there is no cleaning lady at sea! I feelt really bad for all those poor guys junior to me who had to clean them every day. LOL

[jbcjr14]

I have heard the military shitters can be quite nasty, but at the end of the day are some of the cleanest.

[Monkeydad]

This is now one thread I regret ever opening.:tongue