Warpath's Official Man Law Thread

[Warpath]

Originally Posted by gibbsisgod

the first was a blind date and she was hot. i was really into her and about 25 min. into the date she gets a call. i didnt think much of it at first until she started saying stuff like "i'll tell you later", and "yeah, i'll see you in a little bit".
i asked her who that was and she said "nobody".
i had plans to tak this girl to a movie and maybe get some when it was all said and done.(maybe i was fooling myself).the phone rang again 10 min. later and she was like, "yeah were almost done here". thats when i excused myself , stopped by the front desk and paid the check and just left that bitch there.

I have a good book for you. No this is no joke, I do not read either but a friend gave this to me. All I have to say is at least read the description to find out what its about before you completely throw it away...

Book Description
My name is Tucker Max, and I am an asshole. I get excessively drunk at inappropriate times, disregard social norms, indulge every whim, ignore the consequences of my actions, mock idiots and posers, sleep with more women than is safe or reasonable, and just generally act like a raging dickhead. But, I do contribute to humanity in one very important way: I share my adventures with the world. —from the Introduction Actual reader feedback:
"I am completely baffled as to how you can congratulate yourself for being a womanizer and a raging drunk, or think anyone cares about an idiot like you. Do you really think that exploiting the insecurities of others while getting wasted is a legitimate thing to offer?"
"Thank you, thank you, thank you—for sharing with us your wonderful tales of drunken revelry, for teaching me what it means to be a man, for just existing so I know that there is another option; I too can say ‘screw the system’ and be myself and have fun. My life truly began when I finished reading your stories. Now, when faced with a quandary about what course of action I should take, I just ask myself, ‘What Would Tucker Do?’—and I do it, and I am a better man for it."
"I find it truly appalling that there are people in the world like you. You are a disgusting, vile, repulsive, repugnant, foul creature. Because of you, I don’t believe in God anymore. No just God would allow someone like you to exist."
"I’ll stay with God as my lord, but you are my savior. I just finished reading your brilliant stories, and I laughed so hard I almost vomited. I want to bring that kind of joy to people. You’re an artist of the highest order and a true humanitarian to boot. I'm in both shock and awe at how much I want to be you."
"You are the coolest person I can even imagine existing. If you slept with my girlfriend, it'd make me love her more."

[BigSKINBauer]

Originally Posted by gibbsisgod

the first was a blind date and she was hot. i was really into her and about 25 min. into the date she gets a call. i didnt think much of it at first until she started saying stuff like "i'll tell you later", and "yeah, i'll see you in a little bit".
i asked her who that was and she said "nobody".
i had plans to tak this girl to a movie and maybe get some when it was all said and done.(maybe i was fooling myself).the phone rang again 10 min. later and she was like, "yeah were almost done here". thats when i excused myself , stopped by the front desk and paid the check and just left that bitch there.

well played

[BigSKINBauer]

Originally Posted by gibbsisgod

i would say that if she would answer the phone it should be short but sweet. maybe a "can i call yuo back, i am with someone right now", that would be fine but none of that talking about you in code shit. that gets on my nerves!!!

Settled. A woman talks in code about you on a phone while you are paying for her night, you excuse yourself and walk out.

MAN LAW.

[BigSKINBauer]

Originally Posted by Warpath

I have a good book for you. No this is no joke, I do not read either but a friend gave this to me. All I have to say is at least read the description to find out what its about before you completely throw it away...

Book Description
My name is Tucker Max, and I am an asshole. I get excessively drunk at inappropriate times, disregard social norms, indulge every whim, ignore the consequences of my actions, mock idiots and posers, sleep with more women than is safe or reasonable, and just generally act like a raging dickhead. But, I do contribute to humanity in one very important way: I share my adventures with the world. —from the Introduction Actual reader feedback:
"I am completely baffled as to how you can congratulate yourself for being a womanizer and a raging drunk, or think anyone cares about an idiot like you. Do you really think that exploiting the insecurities of others while getting wasted is a legitimate thing to offer?"
"Thank you, thank you, thank you—for sharing with us your wonderful tales of drunken revelry, for teaching me what it means to be a man, for just existing so I know that there is another option; I too can say ‘screw the system’ and be myself and have fun. My life truly began when I finished reading your stories. Now, when faced with a quandary about what course of action I should take, I just ask myself, ‘What Would Tucker Do?’—and I do it, and I am a better man for it."
"I find it truly appalling that there are people in the world like you. You are a disgusting, vile, repulsive, repugnant, foul creature. Because of you, I don’t believe in God anymore. No just God would allow someone like you to exist."
"I’ll stay with God as my lord, but you are my savior. I just finished reading your brilliant stories, and I laughed so hard I almost vomited. I want to bring that kind of joy to people. You’re an artist of the highest order and a true humanitarian to boot. I'm in both shock and awe at how much I want to be you."
"You are the coolest person I can even imagine existing. If you slept with my girlfriend, it'd make me love her more."

I've seen that book before.

[gibbsisgod]

im not a bad guy, i'm just not gonna get played without having the last word

[saden1]

Originally Posted by gibbsisgod

the first was a blind date and she was hot. i was really into her and about 25 min. into the date she gets a call. i didnt think much of it at first until she started saying stuff like "i'll tell you later", and "yeah, i'll see you in a little bit".
i asked her who that was and she said "nobody".
i had plans to tak this girl to a movie and maybe get some when it was all said and done.(maybe i was fooling myself).the phone rang again 10 min. later and she was like, "yeah were almost done here". thats when i excused myself , stopped by the front desk and paid the check and just left that bitch there.

You f'ing paid? Man, that bitch sounded like she was dying to ditch you and you paid? Let me tell you something my friend, she was definitely trying to hit you and run. Tell me you at least went Dutch...tell me you didn't just ran and hit her back.

The first thing I do is take out my cell phone, turn it off and let it be known I'm turning it off. It's all subliminal and if she doesn't turn hers of and answers her phone on top of it you best walk on that date.

On a side note, my bro broke up with this girl he was seeing for 5 months one night cause she put him on hold. I guess she did that before. As the old saying goes, disrespect me once shame on you, disrespect me twice shame on me.

[ArtMonkDrillz]

I stopped paying attention for awhile and people started writing too much. I went to public school, I can't read all that stuff.

Anyways, BSB has to fight his friend and then they can't stay mad at eachother after that. It doesn't have to be a real fight, but at least one person needs to be choked to the point that their face turns red. This fight should take place at the tailgate for the first pre-season game, and it should be recorded and boardcast here on the Warpath. That's just my opinion.

Man Law: if a man buys a round for a group of guys at a bar, each guy in the group owes him a round. This should continue for as long as needed so that every guy is repaid for every beer/shot he purchased. If it is someone's birthday, he gets a free round.

[gibbsisgod]

Originally Posted by saden1

You f'ing paid? Man, that bitch sounded like she was dying to ditch you and you paid? Let me tell you something my friend, she was definitely trying to hit you and run. Tell me you at least went Dutch...tell me you didn't just ran and hit her back.

The first thing I do is take out my cell phone, turn it off and let it be known I'm turning it off. It's all subliminal and if she doesn't turn hers of and answers her phone on top of it you best walk on that date.

On a side note, my bro broke up with this girl he was seeing for 5 months one night cause she put him on hold. I guess she did that before. As the old saying goes, disrespect me once shame on you, disrespect me twice shame on me.

sorry saden, i paid the entire bill and didnt even get to finish my meal but that bitch had to find her own ride home and it was like a 30 min drive. i have never seen this girl again but i hope she had to call a cab cause it was probably more expensive than the meal she got.

being from seattle yuo probably have heard of tom leykis. that is where i got most of my dating advice from and believe me that man knows his stuff.

[ArtMonkDrillz]

Gibbs, nice Seinfeld reference. Maybe I should try to make an offer so I can be mentioned in two peoples' signatures.

[mheisig]

I left the thread for a few hours, but I've just caught up on all the girly whining in here and I propose a new Man Law: No bitchin' about "relationships" with other guys. In fact, don't call them "relationships."

Your bro ditched you and your spring break week for some chick - waah. Maybe if you tell him about how you feel and what you wrote in your Friend's Forever Journal, or threaten to not give back the sweater you borrowed, he might apologize and you can hug, make up, and have a good healthy cry.

Just go out in the backyard, have a good ol' fashioned rumble and be done with it. 'Nuff bitchin.

[BigSKINBauer]

first direct me to where I said "relationship" and for your information he said I could keep the jacket to remind me of him. Gosh.

[number21isabadman]

Man Law: If your girlfriend makes you watch brokeback mountain, dont let your friends are anybody else know about it.

[12thMan]

I still think we need to capsulize bros before hoes into a man law. Lots of back and forth, really good stuff mind you, but no man law was enacted. Or was there?

[12thMan]

What should be the minimum dollar amount borrowed and not repaid to a friend for it not to be worth losing the friendship.

[TheMalcolmConnection]

Originally Posted by 12thMan

I still think we need to capsulize bros before hoes into a man law. Lots of back and forth, really good stuff mind you, but no man law was enacted. Or was there?

There needs to be clarification with that law. If my buddies are having a drinking night and my fiancee is promising me nookie, I'm going to do my best to get both, but if I DO have to make a choice, I'm picking tang any day of the week.