understanding a sexless marriage: Should I stay or go??

[DynamiteRave]

Just coming from a woman, the "Your period is over, it's time to have sex" approach is NOT going to work. Granted she's your wife and the waters are a bit different than from someone you're just dating, it just screams, -I'm desperate for sex- which is, let me say, a turn off. I'm not saying you aren't planning to wine her and dine her in an act of seduction but that coming randomly, especially right after the end of her monthly is more than just obvious. I'm going to suggest you keep trying to talk to her about it, instead of waving your junk at her in a plea that it does something for her.

You need to keep letting her know you care for her and that you're deeply concerned about your relationship with her even in the midst of this sex drought. Love and concern should always come before the sex. My SO right now has told me before that if for some reason they had to abstain from sex to be with me, they would. Because they love me that much and although the sex is important, it's not the make or break of our relationship.

I know, I know, sex is an important part of a relationship but a month shouldn't be making you lose your damn mind. You'd think she had the antidote coming out from between her legs and you're going to die if you don't get it.

But you know what I'm saying? At this point, could you say the same thing about your wife? That you can see her through this, no sex thing? No matter how long? If she's not cheating on you, that is... But if you can't say yes or even maybe then you really need to look inside and do some self-searching.

[GMScud]

Hopefully all went well for SS84 tonight.

[GusFrerotte]

Never heard of 3 years and out before with the sex, especially a young couple. I have heard about the 7 year wall that is usually when the big D comes. What happened in Fla is what you should be asking yourself and her. I admit I am still a bachelor at 40, but most of my buds got married right out of undergrad and never have said complained about bedroom problems even now. All, but one are still married. They are pretty honest with their wives and from what I see and vice versa. You just need to come out with it and ask her what's wrong. 32 days isn't that bad if you both work a lot, etc.

[Dirtbag59]

Is it just me or does anyone else hear this song in their head whenever they read this thread?

[warpaint]

Try sending her some roses to her work with a card some candies or ballons. But in your card. put it all on the line how she is so cold emotionally and physically and how you are so torn apart that she hasnt responed to any of your past moves. Just dont come off like an a-hole. I'm sure their will be some gals acting like AWWW!! I wish someone would send me something like that.

Stay strong and you just follow your heart. Stay or go just look at all the signs they are their for a reason. Good Luck Bro.

[SolidSnake84]

This is Snake.

Without a deep explanation, everything went as planned last night. She came to me when work was over, and things went from there. Afterwards, we talked for about 35 mins. Basically, conflicting work schedules, the fact that sometimes i can be a jerk, and a few other things explained the drought. Many nights the desire was there but she was just too tired to get anything going.

It appears to be over. She told me first thing this morning before i left for work that she would be waiting for me, in a sly kind of way. She deeply deeply apologized for what had happened. Because of our communication problem, i dont think she realized how paranoid i had grown over the past month.

There was nothing that happened in Florida bad. It was just when she got home, it was back to the late shifts and thats where the problem happened. I have promised to be more vocal about things to hope that this doesn't happen again.

Last night could have just been a 1 shot thing, so i'll be paying attention closely.

[htownskinfan]

:headbange:goodjob :

[MonkFan4Life]

YouTube - Kool & The Gang - Celebration


WELL HOT DAMN !!!!!

[SolidSnake84]

Yeah i feel like a new man. I wanna apologize to my friends on here that I lashed out at during the worst parts of the drought. Officially it lasted 37 days. Thanks guys again.

LOL at the Kool and the Gang song. It just fits so perfectly haha

[firstdown]

Originally Posted by SolidSnake84

This is Snake.

Without a deep explanation, everything went as planned last night. She came to me when work was over, and things went from there. Afterwards, we talked for about 35 mins. Basically, conflicting work schedules, the fact that sometimes i can be a jerk, and a few other things explained the drought. Many nights the desire was there but she was just too tired to get anything going.

It appears to be over. She told me first thing this morning before i left for work that she would be waiting for me, in a sly kind of way. She deeply deeply apologized for what had happened. Because of our communication problem, i dont think she realized how paranoid i had grown over the past month.

There was nothing that happened in Florida bad. It was just when she got home, it was back to the late shifts and thats where the problem happened. I have promised to be more vocal about things to hope that this doesn't happen again.

Last night could have just been a 1 shot thing, so i'll be paying attention closely.

So you guys took 2 min having sex and 35 min. talking about it. Seems about right.

[TheMalcolmConnection]

Originally Posted by SolidSnake84

This is Snake.

Without a deep explanation, everything went as planned last night. She came to me when work was over, and things went from there. Afterwards, we talked for about 35 mins. Basically, conflicting work schedules, the fact that sometimes i can be a jerk, and a few other things explained the drought. Many nights the desire was there but she was just too tired to get anything going.

It appears to be over. She told me first thing this morning before i left for work that she would be waiting for me, in a sly kind of way. She deeply deeply apologized for what had happened. Because of our communication problem, i dont think she realized how paranoid i had grown over the past month.

There was nothing that happened in Florida bad. It was just when she got home, it was back to the late shifts and thats where the problem happened. I have promised to be more vocal about things to hope that this doesn't happen again.

Last night could have just been a 1 shot thing, so i'll be paying attention closely.

Awesome. At least you both got it out in the open and know it's both people have work to do.

You got some. I'm so happy for you...

[BleedBurgundy]

The Warpath, saving more marriages than Dr. Phil.

[Gmanc711]

SS, I'm happy for you man....


But is anyone else kind of sad that this thread will be over?

[Monkeydad]

Who says it's over...maybe now we can track another drought from day 1.


Hopefully not, but women are unpredictable.

[MTK]

Originally Posted by Gmanc711

SS, I'm happy for you man....


But is anyone else kind of sad that this thread will be over?

Not at all.