F........Wedding Planning

[EARTHQUAKE2689]

While we are on the subject what is the "acceptable" age for one to get married? And who made that rule?

[mredskins]

Originally Posted by EARTHQUAKE2689

While we are on the subject what is the "acceptable" age for one to get married? And who made that rule?

18 by law otherwise whenever you are ready. People try to come up with formulas or rules for love when in reality there is no way to do so.

[EARTHQUAKE2689]

Originally Posted by mredskins

18 by law otherwise whenever you are ready. People try to come up with formulas or rules for love when in reality there is no way to do so.

Well she hasn't tried to kill me for the insurance money yet and we sleep in the same bed so so far so good.

[mredskins]

Originally Posted by EARTHQUAKE2689

Well she hasn't tried to kill me for the insurance money yet and we sleep in the same bed so so far so good.

Then if you are happy all is good.

[EARTHQUAKE2689]

Originally Posted by mredskins

Then if you are happy all is good.

Yep. Weird thing is we were discussing us having kids the other day.

[mredskins]

Originally Posted by EARTHQUAKE2689

Yep. Weird thing is we were discussing us having kids the other day.

And their goes your happiness....just kidding but it will be the biggest test of your marriage.

[EARTHQUAKE2689]

Originally Posted by mredskins

And their goes your happiness....just kidding but it will be the biggest test of your marriage.

I know right because we both have said we never want any, me mainly because I think I would suck as a dad, but a couple of our friends are pregnant and her brother just had a child so it was a long 2 hour conversation.

[NC_Skins]

Originally Posted by EARTHQUAKE2689

While we are on the subject what is the "acceptable" age for one to get married? And who made that rule?

Divorce Rate : Divorce Rate In America


The divorce rate is substantially higher for people that marry at your age. There is no "acceptable" age that I'm aware of. It's about a person being ready or not, and quite frankly most are not as noted by the rates. Believe it or not, many people that marry at a young age change as they get older and often times become different people as far as what they want out of life. That and people miss out of the life they robbed themselves of had they been single.

[mredskins]

Originally Posted by EARTHQUAKE2689

I know right because we both have said we never want any, me mainly because I think I would suck as a dad, but a couple of our friends are pregnant and her brother just had a child so it was a long 2 hour conversation.

That is a lame reason you just have to love them and have patience. My son is 3 almost 4 he test me as a dad everyday. The past few weeks have been a struggle with him from eating to pooping to sleeping, a lot stems from his 6 month old sister who is now starting to take some of his lime light. Anywho on Saturday morning I was tired and frustrated with him and out of the blue he grabbed his little kids MP3 player and played one of his little kid songs. The lyrics went something like this "can you see the sky in me, can you see past the clouds and see the sky in me." I doubt he realized the gravity of the song and the MP3 player probably just happen to be on that song when he turned it on but it made me realize; I have been focusing to much on his clouds of late and not his sky. We end up having a great weekend together.

[mredskins]

Originally Posted by NC_Skins

Divorce Rate : Divorce Rate In America


The divorce rate is substantially higher for people that marry at your age. There is no "acceptable" age that I'm aware of. It's about a person being ready or not, and quite frankly most are not as noted by the rates. Believe it or not, many people that marry at a young age change as they get older and often times become different people as far as what they want out of life. That and people miss out of the life they robbed themselves of had they been single.

Every couple is different. If it didn't work for couple A that doesn't mean it won't work for you. What s so great about the single life? Yeah those folks may have lost out some of their single life years but they don't live with the regret of not trying.

Again love is nothing you can place rules, formulas, stats, etc... to. It's meaning is different to every single person on the planet.

And if the single life is so great why are most people that are single looking for a mate?

[EARTHQUAKE2689]

Originally Posted by NC_Skins

Divorce Rate : Divorce Rate In America


The divorce rate is substantially higher for people that marry at your age. There is no "acceptable" age that I'm aware of. It's about a person being ready or not, and quite frankly most are not as noted by the rates. Believe it or not, many people that marry at a young age change as they get older and often times become different people as far as what they want out of life. That and people miss out of the life they robbed themselves of had they been single.

Well we've been "together" for about 10 years and known each other since 3rd grade. So we've been changing for a while but people who marry older get divorced too. We lived together before getting married too. There pretty much isn't anything we don't know about each other.

[EARTHQUAKE2689]

Originally Posted by mredskins

That is a lame reason you just have to love them and have patience. My son is 3 almost 4 he test me as a dad everyday. The past few weeks have been a struggle with him from eating to pooping to sleeping, a lot stems from his 6 month old sister who is now starting to take some of his lime light. Anywho on Saturday morning I was tired and frustrated with him and out of the blue he grabbed his little kids MP3 player and played one of his little kid songs. The lyrics went something like this "can you see the sky in me, can you see past the clouds and see the sky in me." I doubt he realized the gravity of the song and the MP3 player probably just happen to be on that song when he turned it on but it made me realize; I have been focusing to much on his clouds of late and not his sky. We end up having a great weekend together.

Let me rephrase that I don't want to blow it so bad that I just avoided it out of fear that I would blow it.

[WaldSkins]

Originally Posted by EARTHQUAKE2689

While we are on the subject what is the "acceptable" age for one to get married? And who made that rule?

My dad always told me to wait until atleast 30. I made it till I was 28 so i guess thats close enough

[skinsguy]

I'm going on 37 and getting married in October. This is my first and hopefully only marriage. She isn't too far behind me in age, and this will be her first time getting married as well. It works for us, because we both know exactly what we want out of life, and that the things we both were looking for out of a mate are things that truly mean something to a marriage. I do believe that when you hit your thirties, you tend to have a clearer understanding of what you want out of a mate and out of life itself. That doesn't mean it's any easier finding the right one for you, but its much easier understanding who the wrong ones are, lol!

As far as the feeling of being "robbed" from your single life if you got married in your twenties....I'm not sure I understand that line of thinking either? When a person finds the right one, there is not going to be a sense of feeling robbed - I don't care if you're 20 or if you're 40.

[Schneed10]

Yeah if getting married makes you feel robbed of something, and hence regret getting married, then you're with the wrong person. That piece has nothing to do with age.

As for the stats, they don't lie. But you're more than a statistic. You become a statistic on the divorce side of that equation by lacking maturity and having unreasonable expectations going into a marriage. If you're mature enough to understand that you're not always going to be right, that you'll have to compromise financially, that you'll both need time together and time apart, and that you'll need to get on the same page when it comes to children, then you'll be fine.

The stats show high divorce rates for those who marry young because young people are more likely to lack maturity and carry unreasonable expectations than older people. But it's the maturity and expectations that cause divorces, not age. If you're a mature young guy your marriage is infinitely more likely to last than an immature older guy's is.

And of course, same goes for your spouse. She needs to be mature too.

Sounds shallow, but here's the secret to a happy marriage: have satisfying sex, make a lot of money, allow each other your own time & space for hobbies, don't get between her and her family, and don't have kids until you're both ready. Those issues are the deal breakers that cause divorces.

I got married at 24. I felt ready then, and looking back, I definitely was. I was light years ahead of my friends in the maturity department. There's a reason they called me grandpa.