understanding a sexless marriage: Should I stay or go??

[Chico23231]

Yep, time for a serious talk....and for god sakes a 40 of Bud Ice? Jesus i just threw up in my coffee

[MTK]

Originally Posted by Chico23231

Yep, time for a serious talk....and for god sakes a 40 of Bud Ice? Jesus i just threw up in my coffee

lol one step at a time. We'll work on his beer choices once he gets this situation straightened out.

[MTK]

What he said above. You've gotta have a serious talk but you can't get worked up or it will quickly go south. Stay objective and don't get caught up in the emotion of things.

[firstdown]

Ok after reading your last post I decided that you need to post a pic of her so we can give you better advise. Yes advise will vary some based on what she looks like. Is she always going over her parents and running errans?

[saden1]

The game plan is to f*ck all that being nice shit....time to be a man and say:

1. I am disgusted by the way you're acting. Things need to change and are going to change around here.
2. I'm not sleeping on the couch again, you are more than welcome to sleep at your parents.
3. I need intimacy on the regular. If I don't get it from you I am leaving your ass within a week.

From the sound of it, this chick is mean spirited and you might be better off without her.

[GMScud]

Originally Posted by saden1

The game plan is to f*ck all that being nice shit....time to be a man and say:

1. I am disgusted by the way you're acting. Things need to change and are going to change around here.
2. I'm not sleeping on the couch again, you are more than welcome to sleep at your parents.
3. I need intestacy on the regular. If I don't get it from you I am leaving your ass within a week.

From the sound of it, this chick is mean spirited and you might be better off without her.

Yup. I definitely lean towards this.

Solid- you are letting her walk all over you. Stop. She's holding you emotionally hostage. Walking around on eggshells in your own house when you've done nothing wrong is a bunch of crap. It's pretty obvious if you come at her with a big attitude she'll probably flip on you, but you've gotta be stern.

You know her better than any of us. Time to sit her down and get some answers. You don't deserve this.

Between TMC's dropping mama at the airport thread, the vasectomy thing, and now this, the Parking Lot has taken on a Dr. Phil kind of feel.

Good luck man.

[Slingin Sammy 33]

Originally Posted by saden1

The game plan is to f*ck all that being nice shit....time to be a man and say:

1. I am disgusted by the way you're acting. Things need to change and are going to change around here.
2. I'm not sleeping on the couch again, you are more than welcome to sleep at your parents.
3. I need intestacy on the regular. If I don't get it from you I am leaving your ass within a week.

From the sound of it, this chick is mean spirited and you might be better off without her.

I hope he doesn't come at her with #3 or he may get it.

Intestacy - Wikipedia, the free encyclopedia

LOL.

Seriously though, the other guys are giving you good advice. If you two can't communicate together and she's going to pull the things she's been, you deserve happiness and it sounds unless there's a drastic turnabout you wil be finding it elsewhere.

[saden1]

Originally Posted by Slingin Sammy 33

I hope he doesn't come at her with #3 or he may get it.

Intestacy - Wikipedia, the free encyclopedia

LOL.

Seriously though, the other guys are giving you good advice. If you two can't communicate together and she's going to pull the things she's been, you deserve happiness and it sounds unless there's a drastic turnabout you wil be finding it elsewhere.

LOL... I blame swype.

[jamf]

Originally Posted by saden1

The game plan is to f*ck all that being nice shit....time to be a man and say:

1. I am disgusted by the way you're acting. Things need to change and are going to change around here.
2. I'm not sleeping on the couch again, you are more than welcome to sleep at your parents.
3. I need intimacy on the regular. If I don't get it from you I am leaving your ass within a week.

From the sound of it, this chick is mean spirited and you might be better off without her.

I agree with everything except #3.
It won't be worth it if she isn't into it and you will be a jerk for forcing her.

I hate to be a dick... Is she seeing someone else? Does she just leave randomly to run errands for a few hours?

I hate to say end a marriage but you are a young guy without any kids...

[Gmanc711]

Originally Posted by saden1

The game plan is to f*ck all that being nice shit....time to be a man and say:

1. I am disgusted by the way you're acting. Things need to change and are going to change around here.
2. I'm not sleeping on the couch again, you are more than welcome to sleep at your parents.
3. I need intimacy on the regular. If I don't get it from you I am leaving your ass within a week.

From the sound of it, this chick is mean spirited and you might be better off without her.

Seriously.... I still think that a month is still a little early to start really doing anything drastic (I know you said it was like 32 days).... but eventually somethings gotta give. As others have stated, this is going beyond sex at this point... clearly something is either going on or is wrong.

And not for nothing, but if she's going to her parents house often, would it be nuts for you to stop by when she's over there? I mean I hope she's not cheating on you, but if thats a common theme, you might want to stop in or drive by to check it out.

[Dirtbag59]

Originally Posted by Gmanc711

Seriously.... I still think that a month is still a little early to start really doing anything drastic (I know you said it was like 32 days).... but eventually somethings gotta give. As others have stated, this is going beyond sex at this point... clearly something is either going on or is wrong.

And not for nothing, but if she's going to her parents house often, would it be nuts for you to stop by when she's over there? I mean I hope she's not cheating on you, but if thats a common theme, you might want to stop in or drive by to check it out.

She's not talking about it, instead she's resorting to name calling and domineering tactics. At worst serving her with divorce papers will send a warning shot without having to resort to empty threats and screaming matches and maybe she'll stop taking her marriage for granted. If they do end up getting divorced then Snake will save himself the pain of being stuck in not only a sexless marriage, but a loveless marriage.

Marriage is suppose to be tough, but not like this.

Originally Posted by Mattyk

What he said above. You've gotta have a serious talk but you can't get worked up or it will quickly go south. Stay objective and don't get caught up in the emotion of things.

This is very sound advice for any argument. Usually the person that ends up getting all worked up is the one that ends up looking like an idiot. Trust me I've looked like an idiot plenty of times, especially when I thought I was "laying down da law."

[SBXVII]

Originally Posted by Dirtbag359

She's not talking about it, instead she's resorting to name calling and domineering tactics. At worst serving her with divorce papers will send a warning shot without having to resort to empty threats and screaming matches and maybe she'll stop taking her marriage for granted. If they do end up getting divorced then Snake will save himself the pain of being stuck in not only a sexless marriage, but a loveless marriage.

Marriage is suppose to be tough, but not like this.



This is very sound advice for any argument. Usually the person that ends up getting all worked up is the one that ends up looking like an idiot. Trust me I've looked like an idiot plenty of times, especially when I thought I was "laying down da law."

This is most likely due to maturity. How old are they would be my first question. Just looking at what you posted not looking back I'd guess they are early twenties. These types of tactics are common with young newly weds. If they were older and name calling was used I'd say there definitly is an issue.

[saden1]

Originally Posted by Gmanc711

Seriously.... I still think that a month is still a little early to start really doing anything drastic (I know you said it was like 32 days).... but eventually somethings gotta give. As others have stated, this is going beyond sex at this point... clearly something is either going on or is wrong.

And not for nothing, but if she's going to her parents house often, would it be nuts for you to stop by when she's over there? I mean I hope she's not cheating on you, but if thats a common theme, you might want to stop in or drive by to check it out.

I am assuming he had a nice chat with her...if he has and she is still acting like this it is time to play the American Beauty card if not the "this shit is over" card.

[TheMalcolmConnection]

Originally Posted by saden1

I am assuming he had a nice chat with her...if he has and she is still acting like this it is time to play the American Beauty card if not the "this shit is over" card.

From reading the other thread about my wife and our problem, you'd think I would be the last person to follow the "F YOU" card, but I did and it seemed to work. I mean, typically I just let shit happen and not worry, but the mom thing I was absolutely firm about and in the end, she got that she wasn't going to win.

I definitely agree that now a firmer stance is needed. Not a, "Get naked, you're gonna' take this!" type of stance, but it's time to not take anymore shit.

[Hog1]

Well.........something is obviously WAY the F... up and you are not being told. The errands and hanging out at mom and dads makes me suspicious. You have to much invested at this point not to ride it out?